I was talking to one of my mentors and he posed a question to me. He asked, “Who taught you how to pray?” I sat there for 30 seconds trying to think and all I could say is no one. I just listened to other people. Most things I do in my relationship with God was not taught by a mentor. It’s what I heard other people do or how they interpreted scripture. Growing up, the main focus for most people is to find a spouse or find a great job. Find a way to make money. Find a purpose even. Almost no one has ever told me to find a mentor. I think that is the reason we have so many people that get nothing out of life. They have looking for friendships, marriage, parents, siblings, employers, investors, business partners but never mentors.
As a young man, no one had to tell me to look for a girlfriend. My body did that naturally. No one had to tell me to run as a kid. My body ran naturally. I saw people playing basketball and I wanted to do that. I was never good at it but i could do it. My point is our world systems point us in every direction except for mentorship. But we need mentors. I remember i had a friend. She was intelligent and friendly. She loved to read and write. At the time of meeting her, I didn’t care for either. I did read a bit but never to the amount of how I read now. Over time with me speaking with her she opened my interest in writing and reading to a level I didn’t know I had. She became somewhat of a mentor for me in that area but she was a woman and she was cute. So I kinda destroyed our connection because we were never able to progress our relationship past friendship into something more. I kept treating her like a pretty girl with pretty thoughts instead of a mentor who could help me see something new in my life.
What I am saying is that our world is so backward that before now I could never consider a woman as a mentor. That friend and I don't talk anymore because our lives went in separate directions but I now know what she meant to me in that space. Mentors open doors to your desire that you didn’t know you had. Take Elijah and Elisha. Elisha is a young man who wanted to do the work of a spiritual man (a prophet). Elijah is one of the most iconic prophets in the old testament. His miracles are unheard of ever happening again. Elisha makes a crazy request of Elijah that speaks to mentorship. Elisha asks for a double portion of Elijah’s spirit. Elijah doesn’t tell him yes. He simply says if God allows you to see me being raptured then you will have a double portion.
Long story short Elisha does see Elijah being taken up into Heaven. Elisha gets his request and he does double the amount of miracles that are listed for Elijah. The point of that story is not you should request to get someone’s spirit. The point of the story is to see that mentors lead you in the path that you wouldn’t have gone if they weren’t in your life. Elijah’s spirit represented his passion. Mentors pass on their passion for something to others. Many people need that. Too many of us get stuck in the 9-5 lifestyle. Work becomes our passion when it was never meant to be the fullness of who we are as people. We should always aim to excel at work but grow our life. Mentors grow our passion for life. They don’t make you into anything you don’t ask for.
Mentors aren’t there for you every step of the way. They don’t make you do anything. They guide you, they give advice. Like Elijah did. He said if you can see it then you can do it. If God has given you the vision then he will give you the passion. The problem with many people is they can’t see their own passion. They can’t even see what they are good at. There are many people that need the influence of someone else besides a spouse, a friend, or work. Some people use coaches. They seem to work fine but that's for money. It does work but not everyone has money. Everyone should have a mentor.
The Bible tells us in the council of many there is security. Friends or a parent give great advice but having advice from a mentor should be highly valued. You need advice from people you trust but a mentor is another level of security that most people don’t have. Mentors don’t have to be great they just need to be present. Mentors don’t need to be millionaires. Many people assume because a person is business savvy they are automatically qualified to give great advice but some of the best advice I have ever received came from people who didn’t earn any more than I did. Money is great in value but perspective is priceless.
There is a whole generation coming after us who need a good perspective from good mentors. The news is not good enough, social media is overhyped with too much advice, and parents and friends are good to listen to but in the end, we could all use sound judgment away from work, home, church or school. I don’t know all the answers to this problem but I just hope that everyone would reserve themselves to seek a mentor. Talk to someone or be someone that another person could talk to. I don’t think that forced mentorships should work. People grow from different things. I would have never gotten into writing and reading more if I didn’t talk to my friend. She shared her passion with me and through that, I grew my own. So I think we should all allow mentorships to grow out of our connections with people.
I am not saying mentors will fix every problem we have in society. No one thing will. However, I am saying that we are missing out on so many people being productive in their life because they settle. I like a video game called Final Fantasy 7. In the game, a guy named Cloud is the main character but he starts out not caring about the whole plot of the story. He then meets a guy named Barrett who is overly passionate about the plot. Over time Cloud not only grows to care about the plot but ends up bringing other people to the cause. Moses is leading the Israelites out of slavery and into a better land for their future. However, the number of problems they face seem endless. One of the issues they face is Moses has to judge all the issues the people are having on the way. There are things that happen that need advice and guidance even in the desert.
Jethro is Moses’ father in law and he takes him to the side and gives Moses sound advice about appointing judges for the people to talk to about daily problems. This way good guidance is given and Moses isn’t tired from all of the daily needs. This might seem like a simple fix but honestly, there were 1 million people there and no one but Jethro thought of this. Mentors are needed because they think of things that most people don’t. It’s not great advice, it’s sound advice and many people need that in their life. The internet has proven that most people don’t need advice from everyone. Everyone gives great general advice but only certain people can give purpose lead advice. I really believe most people can be a mentor to someone. You just need to be patient and willing.
Being a mentor should not be seen as a great task. It’s a simple thing with simple input. Some people complicate things too much and that's the worst thing a mentor can do. The point of guidance is not to frustrate people but to simplify the thought process. I consider Td Jakes a mentor in the way I approach preaching. When I listen to him preach I understand more about my own desire to preach. He simplifies it. However when I listen, John Piper, I really don't get much out of his preaching style. Although John Piper is a great preacher I just don’t hear much with his style. That's not to take anything away from his style or message, both are great. It’s just that we all hear differently and process in different ways. You need to find a voice that helps you understand what you can affect in this world. Don’t find a mentor who is a yes man. Find a mentor who makes you question your no’s.
A mentor will lead you to challenge your borders without destroying your boundaries. I have had other people in my life who I wanted to consider a mentor but they frustrated me more than motivated me. It was nothing wrong with their method or message; they just weren't meant to mentor me. There is nothing wrong with me or them because it didn’t work. Not all plants need the same amount of water to grow. Not all plants need the same amount of light to flourish. A cactus can thrive with a little water but a rose needs nourishment. Some people can grow the most with just a little advice and push in the right direction. Some people, in turn, need deep conversations about understanding a certain idea. The purpose decides the need.
No one understands the needs until you challenge our ideas. No person can assume the needs of another until we hear each other's thoughts. No one can clear a path without some type of opposition. Otherwise, you are not making a path you are just following someone else. Many kids need someone to show them their path. It’s easy for everyone to follow someone else's dream or vision but most of them need a path that doesn’t fit into everyone else's goals. Mentors naturally help with that. We need mentors now more than ever in the world dying by the greatness of followers.
Comments