Another thrown pillow at the back of my head. I’ve told my nephew a million times not to throw anything at people. But he does it again. He is really accurate now that I think about it. But that's not the point. I am getting frustrated with this little human. I’m sure you have felt the battle of wills that comes with dealing with 3yr olds. No matter what happens at one point they choose to disobey everything. Even the smallest things that don’t really matter. They are aggressively defiant or treat everything like a game. As I sat there I decided to hold in my frustration and not blow up on someone who wouldn’t understand where it was coming from. I remember what it was like for me to be a child. Sometimes I would get in trouble with no idea why. One second we were enjoying life and then the next thing I know I’m crying in a corner in a time out because I did some mysterious sin that I don’t quite get.
As the 3yr old finally stopped throwing things in my general direction he sits underneath my left arm. He takes my hand and places it on his face. I forget the last 10 minutes of frustration and hold him quietly in my left arm. It’s an odd feeling but at that moment God starts talking to me and he says this is how He sees me. The thought is so jarring for a moment I’m taken back. God has never physically held but his point continues to show itself to me while I replay all the things my nephew has done recently. I slowly start to realize how I see my nephew is how God sees me. Not exactly but in a more general sense of the fact that I am his child and he is my elder. Here are 3 ways God sees us as a child.
God knows more than we know
Sometimes when I’m dealing with a disobedient 3 yr I start to realize that he doesn’t understand why I’m telling him no. All he can see is I’m stopping him. The reason I’m saying no is not that I dislike my nephew, I’m saying no because we don’t need 300 folds of kleenex pulled out right now. There is a time for that but it’s not time right now. As a 3 yr old, he doesn’t understand timing. Given the chance, he would waste many things he was given. God shows me that I am the same way. The reason he directs me to wait is not that he hates my enjoyment but because he understands my future needs. I constantly want everything I think I deserve in this life. Stuff, friends, sex, happiness, and many other things. But I’m still single and waiting because I do feel like God is telling me it’s not the time for some of these things now. Just like I say no to my 3 yr old nephew because I’m aware of the millions of times he will need that kleenex later God is very aware of the millions of times I will need faith in him later on in my life.
God knows me better than I do
My nephew is strong. Stronger than I think he knows he is anyway. When I try to get things out of his hands many times he will snatch it right out. There was a fan sitting on the floor that was turned on. My nephew wanted to take a pin and put it through the opening in the fan. I know what’s going to happen but he doesn’t. Sometimes when God takes things from us it’s not because he doesn’t like us but he understands the things in our life that can hurt more if we had them. Sometimes things hurt our faith so much that we can’t even feel like God loves us. But Jesus is talking to his disciples and he says “God knows the numbers of hairs on your head. So why take thought for your life. (Why be anxious?)” Jesus is basically saying since God knows us so well why would we worry if he loves us or cares about us. I’m currently at a new job and in a new city that I feel like God led me to.
Every now and then I will have unsure thoughts and sadness of being in a new place and not knowing anyone or my future here. But Jesus reminds us that no matter where God takes us, He cares about us being there. No matter where this life is taking you, you can be sure that God is aware of it and he knows how to see you through it. Just like my little nephew is confused when I take his hand away from the fan, we as Christians get confused by God not giving us something we think we need. But trust me, my nephew is whole without the thing he wanted. You are whole without anything else in this world as long as you have the loving touch of God in your life. He knows you better than you know yourself. Take heart in that and trust him with his no as much as we love his yes.
God can’t talk to us about everything
It’s actually comical but my nephew starts to put his own shoes on. Telling me defiantly that he doesn’t need my help. He starts to put the first one on and it goes without a hitch. Then he starts to put the second one on and he notices it’s not fitting. He starts to get frustrated a little but treks on. After another 3 attempts, he stares at the shoes like they are some new thing he has never seen before. He tries a few more times and starts to cry and scream out of frustration that the shoe he knows belongs to him won’t fit on his foot. The shoes are on backward. The right one worked however uncomfortable.
However, because those shoes weren’t designed for the opposite foot his hard-earned effort was bound to fail. He didn’t want my help during the whole process. I try to talk to him and explain it’s backward but I might as well be talking to myself. He doesn’t understand the words because he is 3yrs old. I am 30 something years old. This is the same thing when it comes to God dealing with us. We are adults and he is eternal. In fact, God is not even human. The bible says God is a spirit. God is love. God is holy. His entire being is something we are not even close to being. Sometimes life is complicated. Sometimes the thing we think is the easiest is actually backward.
Just like my experience with my nephew God has this desire to help us but we often push it away because we don’t want Him the way He chooses. I want him to help me the way I choose. God wants to help me through faith but I want him to help me through instant gratification. Jesus says faith is like a seed that a planter puts into the ground. God is always talking to us but the way He communicates is through the conversation of faith. Many times we want God to help us by magically changing the shoes on our feet. But God is not a foot switcher. In fact, Paul helps us understand God’s plan for us by saying in 2 Corinthians 5:7 For we walk by faith, not by sight:
Even right now as I write this he is sitting next to me drinking out of my water bottle I didn’t give him. It reminds me of the time Peter told Jesus he wanted the cup he was going to drink and Jesus told him he didn’t know what he was asking for. How many times have I prayed to God for something that was never meant for me? Now I am more careful to pray, not my will but your will be done. Honestly, I just don’t know what is meant for me in this life. But I know the one who gave us all things. I know the one who knows how all those things will affect me. I know the one who knows how I can affect the world around me in a better way. Do yourself a favor and have grace with your relationship with God. After all, you are a child to him, and just like I will always forgive and love my nephew even when is not doing everything right, God will always love his children. God doesn’t need our perfection, he wants our willingness to obey his path even when it doesn’t make sense to us. God loves us as his children. He always has.
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